Who are you?
I wonder that every single living day.

Will you write my term paper?
No.

How are you qualified to author this site?
I'm not. I'm an idiot. And a geek. An idiotic geek who loves mythology.

Are you Greek?
Well, I'll eat vegetarian gyros, but that's the closest I get. My freshman year I made the huge mistake of joining a sorority, but I try to repress that memory and won't even go there.

Unfortunately, I'm American, and further to my dismay, a Coloradan.

Really, my assignment's due tomorrow, will you please write my paper?
No.

Why do you hate the Hercules and Xena television series so much?
Because they're a farce and completely massacre the true aura of Greek mythology. The so-called writers take such selfish, blatant liberties with the scripts that they make a mockery out of the true stories.

Won't you admit that those shows at least gets people interested in mythology?
Yes, any medium such as television is bound to pique the curiosity of masses. Trouble is, most of Joe Q. Public wander around the earth believing nonsense like Jason was some feeble-minded imbecile or Amazons were supermodel sluts prancing about in bikinis.

Screw you, Xena rocks!
That's not a question.

Okay, I'm really desparate to get this homework done. Can't you at least give me an outline?
No.

I can't find anything about [insert god or demigod]. Are you planning to add more? How big is this site going to get?
As big as I can afford to let this grow. I do this as a hobby, and despite living a pretty sorry existence, I do have somewhat of a life outside the Internet. I'll add material whenever I get a free moment, or else whilst I'm at work (sorry, boss!).

Will you answer my question about mythology?
Yes, as long as it's within reason. If you want to know brief particulars about, say, Oedpius, I'd be happy to answer, but I will not write a 20-page dissertation about Sophocles' trilogy and its implications to Freudian logic in psychoanalysis.

Because this site is so spartan at the moment, I will be posting a Q&A section where you can write in and inquire about mythology. I'll be posting selected questions with my answers, so you may want to try that instead. Just remember [disclaimer] that my answers are my personal interpretation—however warped—and may not be the 'recognized' response of so-called 'experts.' If you copy my reply and then your teacher slams you, well....too bad. I warned ya.

If a train leaves Chicago going approximately 80 mph heading due east, and at the same time a Beemer leaves New York at 60 mph.......?
Lord, a Beemer's only traveling 60 mph? Is the moron who's driving yakking on a friggin' cellphone or something? How the hell should I know?

Please, please, please write my paper. I'll pay you $50.
No....err, wait. Cash?

Okay, do you know that you suck?!
Yes, what's your point?

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